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Forcing myself to commit.

We are gonna lockdown 3 with immediate family. The new smash-hit by Eddy Grant.



Biography of a nobody day 5. January 5th 2021.


I Woke up EXTREMELY tired but my daughter is here so it was happy tired. Fed her some breakfast and then got her wrapped up for the road and went for a morning drive. (In a borrowed vehicle from a family member in my bubble). Another family member, from the same bubble, then asked if I would like to work on my car with him tomorrow. An offer at which I jumped at!

Not only is it some socialising- it is a slight temporary return to working with my hands. I miss it so much! Also, it will save me money and I need my car!!

This did not stop my body and brain from reacting to the thought of doing anything other than melting at home knock the energy out of me. Why? Why does that happen?

I, up until about a year ago, was the person dragging everyone else out the house for some fun, work or adventure?!?? Now my brain actively avoids ANYTHING and EVERYTHING.

Well, luckily, my daughter has been at home with me today so I couldn't wallow for more than about 3 minutes at a time. Even if I was sat on the toilet. She is at a super independent yet incredibly needy stage. She will do anything you ask her independently- but she wants you to watch her doing it.

Every now and then I think she is past it as she wanders into her room to tidy it AGAIN. She starts singing frozen or talking to her paw patrol pups and I think I may have 10 minutes of me-time. Then I hear “Daddy, come watch me tidy” or “Daddy, come help me tidy”. If I say “you can do it, you are a big girl” she may distract herself for another minute telling me about how tall she is, how she's not a baby, and how she can do anything because she is a princess and she has magic hair and magic legs. Then she realises I'm not paying her attention again and asks me to “help her”. I then need to perhaps help her put a sock back on she has removed on purpose (the only item of clothing she seems unable to put on herself) or help her reach something.

Needless to say, the day disappeared quickly. We had a few minutes on Mariokart again which was hilarious - (I got myself a switch for Christmas, it's epic- Zelda, Mario and pokemon reviews incoming!).

We also had a little bit of chocolate I found hidden in the fridge and generally had fun. I am pretty partial to Pixar films so in between the semi-educational play we had (count this, draw that) we watched Zootropolis and ... Frozen 2.... again. At this point, I may as well count it as a top 10 film of mine since I have probably watched it more times than my actual top 10 films all added together.

Let's see what tomorrow brings, shall we. I did manage to do a bit more work on the website. I set up a mailbox and a submission section so people can ask me shiz (try it out). So that was productive as well.

.... it is 3 am again though. I need to completely re-jig my sleep pattern- this likely isn’t helping my brain at all.

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