My 2020 Birthday plans.

Don't know why I do this. Hide and seek, but for cash, with challenges!

I love birthdays. Except when I have forgotten one, which is most of the time. I mainly love my birthday though- because people feel the need to indulge my ridiculous side- and I try to make it as fun for everyone as possible. This was what I had planned for my Birthday in 2020. So, as I am sure you can imagine.. it didn't happen, something about a deadly plague?

Anyway, moving on- this was the brief I was planning to send out to friends and family that I thought would enjoy it.


Hi all- welcome to an exclusive list of people I thought were brilliant enough to take part in the first of many epic scenarios.

So, for the anniversary of my birth on the **** of ******* (the day the earth decided to balance all the shit in the world- lord knows we needed some good after 2 world wars and the invention of peanuts) I would like everyone to remember what it is like to be me- a child.

My plan is to play a MASSIVE game of hide and seek, with a twist or two.

The venue

The family farm- where you will be hiding, completing challenges for points, and hopefully winning some DOLLA (we need it, the pounds for shit atm)

What you require

You will require your wits, a fully charged phone or camera (go-pro is a winner), your best Arnold/Rambo camo impression and £10.

You may wear whatever you like (it is the uk- bring something warm) and any camouflage additions you like!

Short straw is the law

upon arrival to the farm, you put your money in the pot (£10 per entry) then you pick a straw.

Once all participants have arrived - shortest straw is the seeker (and since they cant participate in the winning pot- automatically win 10%- and a further 10% if they catch ALL participants) then everyone else takes a map of the farm boundaries and a challenge list. They then run like the wind because they have one hour to adequately hide somewhere on the farm.

Where is the twist?

Obviously at the minute this sounds easy- massive farm- 1 person seeking, loads of wannabe Rambos- and questionable weather.

The twist is the task list presented before you. This is how you win- staying hidden the longest is only to give you more time to complete your challenges- which you MUST record yourself doing- from cartwheels to animal noises. 10 points per fully completed challenge- the most points wins the pot.

You can work in pairs if you like- and split the pot- its all up to you. (Points are counted as individuals) But if you are tagged by the seeker, not just seen, then you are out. You calculate your points and hope you completed the most challenges.

The last 3 to be found gain an additional 10, 20 and 30 points respectively.

We can all laugh at each others collected evidence as it is presented after a hard day of hiding and seeking!

Small print

The date I currently have in mind (with a few little details to iron out) is ******************.

The task list is still in development- anything funny you want to add please chuck it into the group chat and we can decide! (Anyone with a lot of prior knowledge of the farm will have handicaps- possibly harder tasks or a deduction in points)

I will then edit the video together from everyones devices and we can all reconvene and laugh when its complete!

Stay legendary.

Ps. If I didn’t invite your partner or something its because I couldn’t find their name- they are obviously invited! Or they are a dick. You know who you are....

Im joking, the more the merrier.


So, that was it. I plan to implement this for fun at some point- when seeing people is slightly less deadly and everyone is ready for a little fun. Maybe 2021 is the year....

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